so I dont believe in this shit, only it happens way to often. where I get empathic mood swings is relation to what friends are feeling. im like “why am I feeling this” to then talk or log onto something and find out someone has been displaying the same emotions
i feel horrid and helpless and selfish and awful
oh my god i am literally drowning in the things i am thinking of
stop right where you are. im here to remind you THAT I GIVE A LOT OF FUCKS ABOUT YOU, and i understand shit is hard right now. to soome degree or another I have been there. so I get what your feeling, so I just want you to remember, I care, I give a fuck, im concerned about you, I want to help if I can, I dont want you to feel you have to go about any off this by yourself.
well, im changing my hair. something close to firrtruck red I think?
thanks, I try ;).
there are two reactions “please, dont do that. you cant feel like that, you have to continue to exist” and “i feel exactly the same” and nothing does anything to make one feel better. so one might aswell not bring it up
petition to make “no romo” a thing
I’ve been there, hon. Internalized arophobia sucks. For me, it was a lot like grieving; I felt as if I had lost part of my future, because I had always hoped and counted on falling in love with someone. There was suddenly this void in my life and I didn’t feel like I could fill it. I felt like an alien because I didn’t have the feelings that everybody else treated as central to the human experience - it was just one tiny difference between me and most other people, but it felt so big.
I’ve answered a few asks like this before, which I think you’ll find relevant. I have a list of aromantic songs that I listen to when I’m feeling down about it. I tried to reframe aromanticism as an emotional spectrum that is not “lacking” romance, but simply different from the romantic spectrum.
I don’t know how well this would suit you, but…in an odd way, it was helpful for me to “reclaim” the robot/alien/heartless/cold stereotype. I like being weird, so I embrace the “weirdness” of being aromantic. I joke about being a heartless bastard, I relate to characters like Spock and robots, and I approach romance as if I were an alien anthropologist studying the ~strange Earthling rituals~. I don’t want to be romantic, because if I were, I wouldn’t be me anymore.
Besides…if you and I are missing out on romantic attraction, aren’t romantic people missing out on what it’s like to be aromantic? Their emotions are slightly different, which means that they can’t fully understand or experience our perspective, either. (And just between you and me, I think having an aromantic perspective is sometimes a Very Good Thing when other people are involved in unhealthy romantic relationships…)